YUKS
Jokes Page 7
Did you hear the one about.....
A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got
back, the bride
immediately called her mother. Her mother asked, "How was the
honeymoon?"
"Oh, Mum," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic..."
Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, Mum, as soon as we returned Sam
started using
the most horrible language...things I'd never heard before! I mean, all these
awful
four-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me home.... Please
Mum!"
"Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What 4-letter words?"
"Please don't make me tell you, Mum," wept the daughter,
"I'm so embarrassed, they're
just too awful! Come get me, please!"
"Darling, you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"
Still sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, Mum, they were words like dust, wash, iron, cook!"
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On a special teacher's day, a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts
from her pupils.
The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it over her head, and
said, "I bet
I know what it is - flowers!"
"That's right!" said the boy, "but how did you know?"
"Just a wild guess," she said.
The next pupil was the candy store owner's daughter. The teacher held her
gift overhead,
shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is - a box of candy!"
"That's right! But how did you know?" asked the girl.
"Just a lucky guess," said the teacher.
The next gift was from the liquor store owner's son. The teacher held the
bag over her
head and noticed that it was leaking. She touched a drop of the leakage with her
finger
and tasted it. "Is it wine?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied.
The teacher repeated the process, touching another drop of the leakage to
her tongue.
"Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied.
The teacher then said, "I give up, what is it?"
The boy replied, "A puppy
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